this weekend
May 25th, 2008 -- Posted in family, life as a mom | 2 Comments »I think I’m going to change my goals and expectations for the weekends. Like maybe along the lines of something like “just survive the damn thing”.
Friday was actually the start of our weekend – our childcare provider needed the day off so Paul stayed home and we both had Avery to look after. We took him to Place d’Orleans and the playplace there and had lunch there as well. For the evening, we planned for our usual movie night and settled on Chinese food. We’d agreed to send Harmony off to her Grandma & Papa (my ex’s parents) but then realized I’ve really been putting off taking her shopping. We gave her a few choices, and decided we might try to go shopping on Friday evening instead of doing movie night. But then by the time we’d been hanging out in the park with Amanda in the kids for half an hour, we realized we didn’t really want to drag ourselves out there. We walked to the movie store to pick something up, but Harmony was uber-whinny and Avery threw a tantrum because he didn’t like the movie we picked. So we didn’t even end up watching the movie we picked up, we went with something shorter.
On Saturday we realized that Harmony had a birthday party to go to so we called to cancel the grandparents’ sleepover. It also meant Harmony wouldn’t be able to make it to gymnastics (from 10-12) as the party started @ 11:30. I asked Harmony if she wanted one of my pre-made-pre-stamped blank birthday cards, but no, she wanted to make her own. What started out as a plan to just grab her some cardstock from my craft area in the basement turned into her wanting to print out an image from the net, which turned into making a card with my in Adobe which turned into changing it, etc. Then the kids had to colour in and personalize the card, etc. Meanwhile Paul was having a quicker shower to try to help get us out the door but the card took so damn long it was unfortunately a wasted effort on his part. All this unbeknownst to me until later. We arrived at Zellers to shop for gifts a little while later, grumpy and irritable. Managed to get some gifts and made it to the party on time. We did our shopping Saturday evening, including getting Harmony her first real bra (what a milestone, awww, too bad she was terrible about it).
Sunday we did Coscto and got our free Harvey’s burgers for lunch (yum!). Got the kids outside in the later afternoon and had my grandmother over for a belated “mother’s day” dinner. Neither my mother nor Paul’s mother were able to make it. My grandmother has really deteriorated lately, which is just so sad. My mother recently moved her into a nursing home, and I saw her place for the first time tonight, it is so tiny. But it does seem like a very nice facility at least, with comfortable rooms to hang out in, nifty services, and a pleasant staff. I feel bad I haven’t been able to do more for her (in the past few months, in the past few years) but at the same time I also feel angry with my mother for not doing her part (and her two brothers for not taking their part of the responsibility either!). It’s been hard for me to cope with my grandmother, as she has no grasp on the gravity of my mental illness and it’s affect on my life and family (”What’s the problem!?!?” I remember her yelling at me during one phone conversation). And yet I still want to be there for her. I was in tears getting back from seeing her and her place tonight. But I’m sure she appreciated the time over at our place and seeing the kids and everything. Thanks hon for bbq-ing and for the yummy DQ cake, we couldn’t've had her over without your help!
Not too hectic of a weekend as far as our usual plans go… this is actually pretty typical. But we were not in great shape (physically or emotionally) and it was hugely stressful to get through it all. There were really some points I felt like tossing things or slamming doors or whatever, I just felt so utterly frustrated. My language was not great, oops. And I did at a few points threaten to smack the kids, which Avery just loved repeating – “Now you’re gonna get a smack!”. Problem is, he *actually* smacks. Ouch.
Harmony has been on a huuuuuuge whining kick lately which has been driving us crazy. She appreciates *nothing*, not cards, not crafts, not being taken places or bought things, not computer time, not meals, not treats, nothing! If you don’t give her something, she’ll pout and fuss. If you give her one thing, she’ll immediately ask for an upgrade… Get her to wear shoes and she’ll complain she can’t have crocs, but let her have crocs and she’ll whine for flip-flops.
Meanwhile Avery has been dropping his afternoon (and only) naptime, which means he is much more cranky (in the evenings especially), but yet not tired enough in the afternoon to have a little rest and calm period. Usually we do still try to have him stay in his room for “quiet time” after lunch but instead he rebels by running out and hiding in other rooms, and then later turfing stuff over his gate (which we’ve put up after the running-and-hiding stage) and sometimes managing to get stuff over the banister and down the stairs!
So I’m thinking of putting my 9 and 3 year olds up for sale, any takers? (((sigh))) No, not really, I love them to bits, it’s just that weekends like these make me question my sanity to be undergoing this “parent thing”. :S
At least we made it through yet another weekend, a long weekend for us, and not at all like the fun and relaxing long weekend we had over the holiday weekend (away from both kids! while up at Karen’s cottage). A very striking difference for sure, and a painful transition to make. Welcome back to full-time parenthood, Kris and Paul… yikes!
I’m looking forward to the weekend being *over*, it’s actually less stressful for us to have the kids out of our hair and just be able to go about whatever work we can accomplish at our own pace. Once we survive the usual craziness of getting-out-the-door-Monday-morning, that is. (((cringe)))
