a bad nightmare
bad nightmare…
I was home alone (which I often have been these days since the car accident) and the doorbell rang. I opened the door and it was Melissa Hilchey. (I have no clue where she lives but she knows where I live) For some reason she had a really huge fruit basket. I screamed and kicked the basket out of her hands and fruit went rolling around my front steps and onto the walkway. I tried to close and lock the door but she forced her way through, I was too physically weak to stop her. She knocked me down and I was face-down on the front hallway carpet. I struggled to get up. She grabbed a knife from the kitchen and stood on my back in her painful shoes. She was yelling and screaming at me frantically. “I’m so much better than you!” she shouted. She started stabbing me in the back. “Admit that I’m better than you!” she threatened, pausing in the stabbing. “Say it!” She held the knife really close to my back so that I could feel the sharpness. “Say I’m not the only one who had CAS come! Say that I’m not a bad mother for having CAS take my own baby away! Say that you’re so much worse than me!” I didn’t say anything, so she started stabbing me again. “Admit that I’m more powerful than you!!!” She just kept screaming and stabbing. I at least managed to scream out “No!” before I lost consciousness, but there was blood gurgling out my mouth.
Yuck, creepy. I can’t wait until this is all over and I can have 100% of my life back.
I sent both of them an e-mail yesterday asking (for the 2nd time) that they stop contacting me. I attached the emails from the 1st time when I’d asked them to not contact me. So hopefully that’s it, that’s all. Done, done, done. They should just leave me alone and stop interfering with my life. Hopefully they can both find better ways to feel good about themselves other than picking on someone who has OCD which causes obsessive thoughts about every little piece of conflict that happens. Hopefully they won’t simply move on to kicking dogs or tripping blind people or something, but will actually stop feeling the need to hurt others in order to make themselves feel more powerful.
I also sent Sarah an e-mail asking her to help make them stop. I told her she’s a good person and that there must be some loyalty left. If she tells them “Look, quit picking on Kris, haven’t you put her through enough?”, then maybe they will listen.
If it all doesn’t stop here, well I don’t know what I’m going to do next. I talked to Paul about getting restraining orders against them, but he says it’s probably more paperwork/trouble than it’s worth. I don’t know if there’s anything much I can do legally, the police probably don’t give a damn about getting involved in a fight over e-mails and blogs and phone calls. They are trying to hurt me, sure, but they haven’t come around my house or tracked my down. Krissie came over to my (small) neighbourhood and the only grocery store that I go to (it’s the only one close to me), but as Paul joked at least she wasn’t chasing me with her grocery cart or anything. Melissa said she called the police on me, but that could’ve just been a threat, a lie meant to rattle me. When she posted anonymously in my blog I didn’t go calling the police on her so I don’t know what their reaction would be to something you can’t really prove and could be fabricated by the owner of the blog. And all I have as proof is a CAS file and a handful of harassing e-mails, like the original “I called CAS on you” e-mail, and a few e-mails from when Melissa said she wouldn’t contact me but then kept repeatedly e-mailing me to take her off my LJ list.
I called my psychiatrist yesterday to see if I could squeeze into a cancellation spot or something, and there had been a cancellation but there was one person on the waiting list so he said he had to offer it to her first before I could have it. So I might not get in to see him to be able to talk all of this over but at least I do get to see him next week, so maybe that will help me feel more calm and be able to just keep moving on like I had succeeded in doing on Monday after my vent … until Krissie crossed over into my little online “world” to stir things up even more. Ugh, seriously, I rant about people intruding on my territory so what do they do? Intrude on it more and upset me more. Some people really make me wonder.
Ok, I’m going to try to go back to sleep now (it’s 4:25 am and I’ve been up since about maybe 3:30am?)… hopefully the painkillers have kicked in and my heat pad has helped. I did go to physio yesterday but after all the stress I was put through, I still had a lot of pain. Sucks that I’m in a position where people can so easily affect me emotionally and physically just from a few simple mean actions… When I’m recovered from the car accidents and recovered from the PPD and OCD, I’ll be so glad to be able to feel a little less fragile and vulnerable.
May 29 2008 03:21 am | EZ-blog Oven and OCD and PPD and massage/physio/chiro and pain / disability and people suck
